Lyrics and Song Details

Just in case you can't understand what we are saying, and if you want to know more details...


Length: 3 min 10 sec
Vocals: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent
Guitar, Synth: Will Wonkers

Krampus Is Coming To Town

Copyright © 2015 The Plastic Bastards
Christmas time is in the air
With presents under the tree
Unless of course, you've been a naughty child
Then you'll burn in the bowels of hell...

Christmas is canceled
The Yule Tide dismantled
The presents you bought
Will soon be for naught
Your joy and good tidings
Will run into hiding
When Krampus is coming to town!
Your holiday cheer
And all you hold dear
Will soon be forgotten
As memories gone rotten
His pain you will feel
As you squirm and squeal
When Krampus is coming to town!

He'll lash you with his tongue
He'll bite you with his teeth
He'll pull you down deep to drown
In a pit of fire beneath!
With big pointy horns
And wrists in a shackle
Your blood will run cold
When you hear him cackle!
HA HA HA HA!!!

If you misbehaved
Then you'll be enslaved
He'll screw down your thumbs
Shove coal up your bum!
Old Krampus lay's waste
And Santa's disgraced
When Krampus is coming to town!

You say what's that stench?
You say what's that smell?
It's brimstone direct from
The fiery depths of hell!
He'll snatch you up quick
He'll stuff you in his basket
He's the ANTI Claus who
Puts you in a casket!

He doesn't care if you are sleeping
He'll beat you wide awake
He knows that you've been bad - not good.
He'll drown you in the lake... OF FIRE!!!!!

Your future looks bleak
You're way up the creek
Your status quite dire
He'll drown you in fi re!
So go pout and cry
Cause you're doomed to die
When Krampus is coming to town!

There's nowhere to run
There's nowhere to hide
Your yuletide probation has been denied!
He'll kick you with his hooves
He'll whip you with his switch
Man being on Krampus' naughty list
Is such a royal bitch!
When Krampus is coming to town!
When Krampus is coming to town!
When Kram...pus... is co...ming... to toooown!
CHA CHA CHA!

Length: ?:??
Vocals: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent
Guitar, Bass Guitar: Will Wonkers
Lead Guitar: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent, Knife, Fork
Drums: Drum Drops

Either Way It's Fine With Me

Copyright © Randee of the Redwoods
Walkin' down the street the other day.
I saw an apparition comin' my way.
It said Randee set the government and animals free
I said "Hey ya know, either way it's fine with me".

Either way it's fine with me.
If what you're seeing is impossible to see.
If the fax don't match
And your green is too green
If your head don't fit
And your shoes are too mean
Relax and think yeaah.. either way it's fine with me.

We all know these are troubled times..trouble.. are you gettin' that?- check this out.... I went to the Dairy Queen the other day to get a malt- and number one, they don't have malts, just shakes which is my big gripe with the DQ. So I ordered a shake from the woman behind the counter... I said "I'll have a pineapple shake man"... and she just stared at me.. for like an hour and a half. I said "Hey, anytime you wanna make that shake it's fine with me"..and she just kept staring at me. An' I'm goin' you know...you're gonna make it and i'm gonna eat it and that'll be great (yeah, I'm trying to involve her in the experience) 'n she just keeps starin' at me. Finally after about three hours of this I realize.....I'm at home lookin' in the mirror.....the great thing was, I got the shake- so you see....

Either way it's fine with me.
If what you're seeing is impossible to see.
If the fax don't match
And your green is too green
If your head don't fit
And your shoes are too mean
Relax and think yeaah.. 'either way it's fine with me'.

The world has got a lot of weird things.
Voodoo slaves and graves that sing.
Huge forks and spoons and truck tires...
Guys who eat cars and barbed wire.
Dogs that bark,
boats that sink.
Chairs that fold and stoves that clean themselves while you're at work.. you know.. If you gotta job huh.....I don't....I'm gonna get one though man, really....
And swirlin' around in this hurricane...
The broken dishes of a president's brain!

Either way it's fine with me.
If what you're seeing is impossible to see.
If the fax don't match
And your green is too green
If your head don't fit
And your shoes are too mean
Relax and think.. 'either way it's fine with me'.

Either way it's fine with me.
If what yer seein'
heh.. you know it's just it's impossible. Check it out..you know.. We'll go up, we'll go down, we'll go right, we go left.. you know.. We're uptight, we're relaxed....either way.. WHEW!! Right....

Do The Twitch

Copyright © 1988, The Plastic Bastards
Here it comes
Lights! Camera! Umm, ummm..
Action
Darn!

Everybody's doing a brand news dance, now
(What? I sing now?)
(Yeah, sing now)
(Oh, sorry)
Everybody does it like Vivian Vance, now
It's a little tougher to grasp than the birds and the bees
But it's easer to do than counting one two three

Ya do the twitch
Hey, ya do the twitch
Ya do the twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch
Ya do the twitch
I get my kicks
From nervous ticks
I do the twitch

You don't even gotta lift your feet, now
Dupe Dupe Dupe Dupe
Just tense you muscles to the beat, now
Dupe Dupe Dupe Dupe
Don't ask what inspired us to write this song
We don't even know
Come on! Twitch along

Ya do the twitch
Hey, ya do the twitch
Ya do the twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch
Ya do the twitch
That muscle spasm
Makes me orgasm
Let's do the twitch

Well, it's the new dance craze
And everybody's doing it
Even Helen Hayes
Which doesn't rhyme with corn
But I call it maze
So fuck'em all anyways and do the twitch!

Ya do the twitch
Ya do the twitch
Ya do the twitch
I do the twitch, myself
Ya do the t-t-t-t-t-t twitch
Ya do the t-t-t-t-t-t twitch
Ya do the twitch
(TWITCH)
Ned does the twitch
(TWITCH TWITCH)
That's it, Ned! You got it! Wooh! Rock and Roll! All right, yeah yeah.
(TWITCH TWITCH TWTWTWTWTWIIITTCH)
Yeah Ned, man I didn't know you were an epileptic!
(twateawtetetetetetwwwwwwwtittiitch TWITCH)
He's having a seizure! Somebody call a doctor, quick!
(TWITWITIWTIWTIWTIWTIWCHHHHHH TWITCH)
No, Ned, just relax
(TWITCH)
This is all gonna come to pass...
(twitch)
You okay, man?
TWITCH!!!

Length: ?:??
Vocals: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent
Guitar, Bass and Lead: Will Wonkers
Drum Programming: Will Wonkers

Death To The Yuppies

Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards
Goin' down town, gonna kick some trendy asses
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Gonna find me a Yuppie and smash his glasses
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
To the A.T.M.'s with their cards in their hands
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Gotta get more money for the candy man
Cuz he doesn't take checks!
And so we say

Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death to the Yuppies! (owe that hurts)

There they go oh their Honda Scooters
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Like to give 'em all a nice swift kick in their hooters
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
They make me sick, and I'll tell you why
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
They're pompous pricks and they should die
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Yuppie bitch, your clitt smells like clam chowder
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Up your nose goes that white powder
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
We're talking murder, it ain't no joke
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Cuz we put Strychnine in your coke
Ha ha ha ha

Mary had a little scam, little scam, little scam
Mary had a little scam
Her purse was filled with blow

Death!
Death!
Death!
Death!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Death! Death! Death to the Yuppies!
Hahahahaha
Death to Yuppies

Kill The Poor

Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards

Taʞo Hell

Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards

I Wanna Go To The Morgue

Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards


Length: 1 min 23 sec
Vocals: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent
Guitars, Bass Guitar: Will Wonkers
Drums: Programmed by Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent

Love Stinks

Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards
Love Stinks
I think... Duhh

How could that bitch leave me

Love sucks
Just my luck

You stupid bimbo put your brains back in your brassiere

Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul
Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul

Love rots
Like month old cod

I should have known something was fishy when I found out your nickname was flatback

Loves a joke
I'm fucking broke

She took everything I own

Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul
Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul

Love bites (crunch)
What gives her the right

Now she's probably gonna want half

Love reeks
Like spoiling meat

If she thinks she's getting her underwear back she's crazy

Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul
Love really stinks like rotting fish
At the bottom of my fillet of soul

Bitch

Do You Love Me [Now That I Won The Lotto]

Music Copyright ©
Parody Lyrics Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards

Bla Bla Bla Yak Yak Yak

Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards

We Melt Vanilla Ice

Copyright © 1992, The Plastic Bastards

Scooby Doo

Copyright ©

Acid Babble

Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards

Me-Ow Mixx

Copyright ©

I Love Vietnamese Food

Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards

Republicrats And Demicans

Copyright © 2012, The Plastic Bastards

Revolution 10

Copyright © 2012, The Plastic Bastards

Time Warp

Copyright © 1973, Richard O'Brien

I Should Have Known Better With A Girl Like You

Music Copyright © , Lennon, McCartney
Parody Lyrics Copyright © 2011, The Plastic Bastards

Heathcliff

Copyright ©

C. U. Next Tuesday

Copyright © 2012, The Plastic Bastards

Excuse Me While I Go To The John

Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards

Old Time Horror

Copyright © 2013, The Plastic Bastards

Newsy Foxies

Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards

Music Industry Reject

Copyright © 1992, The Plastic Bastards

We Shot The New Kids On The Block

Copyright © 1989, The Plastic Bastards
Oooh, Five kids moved on to the block the other day
Weren't much fun, never wanted to play
Had to put them out of our misery
Now the New Kids On The Block are history!

We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block
Lined em up against the wall and gagged em with a sock
But you should've seen those little suckers run
when we pulled out our Uzis to have a little fun

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block
Yes, it's grim reality
It ain't no crock!
And now the whole world is feelin' jubilated,
'Cause The New Kids On The Block
Have been exterminated
Yes, teeny-boppers, it's sad but true
The bubble-gum scum aren't comin' to you

"That's right, ladies and gentlemen. The tour has been cancelled.
All ticket sales are final!
If you bought' em, You're SCREWED!"

We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block
Pumped 'em full of lead and pushed 'em off the dock

Five New Kids,
We shot!
Uzis sub-machine guns,
We've got!
Merciful Plastic Bastards,
We're not!
'Cause
We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block!

Hey,
We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block
Strung em up by their toes
And pelted the with rocks
But you should have seen those teeny-boppers start to pout
When we reached down their throats
And ripped their scrotums out!

We've
Shot
The New Kids On The Block
Yes, it's grim reality
It ain't no crock!
Now the whole world is gettin' down,
Because The New Kids On The Block are six feet under the ground!

No more New Kids!
No more New Kids!

POW-POW-PA-PA-POW!

They're all dead.

Definite social statement, dude.

Yup

Hot Patootie, Bless My Soul

Copyright © 1973, Richard O'Brien

Sexy Bitch

Copyright © 2012, The Plastic Bastards

Keep On

Music Copyright ©
Parody lyrics Copyright © 1990, The Plastic Bastards

The Continuing Story Of President Bill

Music Copyright © Lennon, McCartney
Parody lyrics Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards

Krampus Is Coming To Town

Music Copyright ©
Parody lyrics Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards

Leg Raped By A Furry

Copyright © 2013, The Plastic Bastards

Jersey Whores

Copyright © 2012, The Plastic Bastards

Working Overnight At The Gas Station

Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards

Mean Mister Phelps / Polyester Sam / He Broke Out Through The Closed Window

Music Copyright © , Lennon, McCartney
Parody Lyrics Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards


Length: 2 min 21 sec
Vocals: Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent
Guitar, Bass, Ukulele : Will Wonkers
Drums: Programmed by Will Wonkers, Ned Nugent

Bieber Loves Wiener

Copyright © 2011, The Plastic Bastards
Justin Bieber
wants a big wiener
Justin, Justin
So happy and gay
He would partake
of a juicy tube steak
Justin Justin
please go away

(childish laughter)

Justin Bieber
loves a big wiener
Give him a foot long
He can't go wrong
Thick and round too
No slim Jim will do
This brat wants a big
Bratwurst in his bun

Justin Justin so happy and GAY
He wants to knock up your knockwurst
In the worst way
Justin Justin would throw a buffet
If you'd only let him batter-dip
your corndog today!

Justin Bieber
loves a big wiener
Give him a foot long
He can't go wrong
Thick and round too
No slim Jim will do
This brat wants a big
Bratwurst in his buns

Justin Justin so happy and GAY
Bieber's sharpened his meat cleaver so
you'd better make way
Justin Justin the insatiable hog
He'll swallow up your beef stick
And your foot long hot dog!

Justin Bieber
loves a big wiener
Give him a foot long
He can't go wrong
Thick and round too
No slim Jim will do
This brat wants a big
Bratwurst in his bun

Hey! Que Pasa,
Won't you give him your kielbasa?
He'll want it,
He'll love it!
Down his throat he'd love to shove it...
Whos your daddy
Whos your mommy?
Whos the boss of the salami?
Look out Usher
Look out Moby
Cuz hes after your meat stogie

Justin Bieber
loves a big wiener
Give him a foot long
He can't go wrong
Thick and round too
No slim Jim will do
This brat wants a big
Bratwurst in his bun

Justin Bieber
would commit misdemeanors
he'd sell his soul
For a steamy meat roll
His favorite cut
Is a big, juicy butt (steak)
iit ain't no baloney
He wants fat pepperoni!

(spoken)
Dude!
What?
You know, we really shouldn't make fun of her like this.
UmHum, Special Delivery, hot-diggity-dog!
(laughter)
Word!

You Make Me Sick, Motherfucker

Copyright © 2014, The Plastic Bastards

Moving In One Direction

Copyright © 2013, The Plastic Bastards

You're A Mean One, Reverend Phelps

Music Copyright © ,
Parody Lyrics Copyright © 2011, The Plastic Bastards

Breaking Out

Copyright © , Richard O'Brien